Team Culture

A couple of my ten readers may know that I'm a fan of basketball.  I played basketball in high school and in college (on an intramural team - Go, Sewer Boys!).  And I've been a fan of the San Antonio Spurs since George Gervin was playing.

So, if you're even aware that the NBA finals are happening right now, you might guess that I'm spending some time watching the series between the Spurs and the Miami Heat. 

It's fun for me to watch the games, but I'm more interested in writing about something I've noticed about these two teams.  I'm obviously a Spurs fan, so what I'm writing may be biased, so please read what I write with a grain of salt.

As I watch the post-game interviews, I notice a difference between the Spurs players and many players from other teams. 

What I noticed the other day, after game two (when the Heat destroyed the Spurs), Heat star Lebron James was talking continually about himself.  He talked about his own performance in the game - and even when he talked about his teammates, he referred to them as his players, and as his guys.

In contrast, whenever I listen to Spurs players, they talk very little about themselves and a great deal about the contributions their teammates made.  And they compliment the play of their opponents.  I don't hear that from most other professional athletes, especially basketball players. 

It's a relief, in our culture that's so wrapped up in self-centeredness, to hear rich and famous people humbly focusing on others.

It seems that there's a different kind of culture in the Spurs organization - a culture where individuals support one another for the sake of the team.

I wonder what church would be like if we were more focused on our neighbor more than on ourselves.  Wait ... didn't someone with the initials J.C. mention something about that?

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Children in Worship, once more

Today at church there were quite a few kids.  Many of those who often show up were there at the same time.  Plus, there were a number of others who were visiting to celebrate a baptism. 

And there was life.

I think we all felt it. 

There was an atmosphere of vibrancy at worship, as if the energy of the young people was contagious.  Now you must know that there was a time or two when someone in the congregation might have though that one or two of the children was momentarily too loud ... but by and large, even when a child made some noise, the atmosphere carried life rather than annoyance.

And what I believe the community experienced during the liturgy, in addition to our own worship, was the worship of those young people. 

By the simple fact of being in the midst of the whole rest of the congregation, they allowed the rest of us (who are normally relatively quiet during the liturgy) to catch a glimpse of their own experience of the divine. 

Which got me to thinking ... who are we (who prefer it quiet) to say that (we're right and) the children are wrong to make noise when they worship?



Why is it that we act like we believe that the only way to worship is by sitting still and being quiet?  What if they, with their squirmy selves, are worshipping more fully than we with our minds that get so distracted by grocery lists and family concerns and whether we'll get out of here in under an hour this week?

For the little beautiful one who was baptized today, I heard the noises of the other kids calling to her.  I heard, "Come and join us here - we're in a place where we are welcomed as we are."

She was welcomed into community by young and old alike this morning.  But what if she had been the only non-adult present this morning?  What if the entire congregation had been adult?  She would have certianly received a welcome. 

But it wouldn't have been enough.  She would have only been welcomed in an adult way, into an adult community, where the expectation would be that she should worship like an adult. 

Thanks be to God there was diversity of ages joined together in worship this morning, so that the newly baptized could be welcomed, exactly as she is, by the whole people of God. 

And thanks be to God for children who have not yet put away childish things ... for it is to such as these that the kingdom of God belongs.

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Children in Worship, Again

In the congregation where I serve as pastor, we've been thinking and talking (and struggling just a little bit) with the place and role of children and parents in worship. 

In our June newsletter (we publish a monthly newsletter designed to connect folks to our life together as church), the article I wrote was focused on this topic. 

I'd love to hear any feedback that my seven (ten?) readers might have.  Since it's written to a particular congregation, I'll edit the article so that, hopefully, it makes sense here in this context.

... many of you have noticed that "children in worship" has become a topic of conversation in this congregation.

From what I’ve heard, the conversation has typically been focused on how children behave in worship.  I think that, for the most part, we all agree that it’s good for children to be in worship.  I think most of us agree that there’s a certain amount of noise a child can make, and a certain amount of moving around that a child can do before that child becomes an inappropriate distraction to folks around her or him.  And I think most of us agree that if children can’t behave well, if they move around too much or make too much noise, it’s best for them to be taken into the narthex (foyer/lobby) until they’re calmed down.

The trouble that we identified the other day at the church council (governing body in the congregation) meeting is that each one of us has a different definition of “too much”.

We are a varied and diverse group of people ~ I question whether we’ll be able to come up with a radius of movement or a decibel level that everyone can agree to.

So I started wondering ~ what if we re-frame our conversation?  I’m sure we already think in these terms, but what if we start saying out loud to each other, “How are we raising up children in the faith?”, and “How are we fulfilling the promises we made to young people when they were baptized?”

To that end, I’d like to think for a moment about we do well as a congregation, rather than worrying about what any particular individual or household does poorly.

1) Among other things, this congregation has a tradition of inviting young people to a front-row seat to watch baptisms, which allows them to be surrounded by a whole congregation confessing their faith and praying for each other. 

2) This congregation has a tradition of welcoming children to hear a message geared to them during the worship service. 

3) This congregation has a tradition of pairing confirmation students with adult mentors for conversation and worship during the season of Lent. 

4) This congregation has a tradition of providing children a safe place to make friends with other children and with caring adults.

I wonder how our conversation would be different if our concern was less about what other people are doing during worship and more about how we as a congregation can best raise up children of faith.  I’m excited to continue to hear from you, and to continue to have this conversation. 

My hope for the congregation I serve, and for this forum as well, is that this can be a start to conversation about who we are and how we are as children of G-d. 

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Children in Worship

There can be no keener revelation of a society's soul than the way in which it treats its children.

     ~ Nelson Mandela

I don't know whether it actually happened or not, but I heard one time about an old and curmudgeonly pastor who was asked about the noise that some children were making during worship, especially during the sermon. Picture the classic and stereotypical German Lutheran pastor who was of the age to have retired in the early 1970's. You know, a little bit gruff and a little bit opinionated and a little bit stubborn.

What I heard is that, when he was asked about the noise children were making, he replied that he enjoyed it … he said that the screaming of little children during the worship service is simply evidence that parents are bringing their children up in the church.

The way I imagine the conversation going, I don't think that the questioners getting the answer from the pastor that they wanted.

That congregation (the one with the old German pastor, a congregation and pastor which may well only exist in my mind) is not the only one where children (and the parents of children) who make noise or move around during worship get sideways looks from other members of the congregation; it's not the only congregation where people come to the pastor with a complaint about those children, or a request that the leadership come up with a solution to the distraction that children cause during the liturgy.

From what I can tell, the problems that people have with children in worship have to do with their own personal comfort level, with their own ability to pay attention to the liturgy, and with their own ability to worship.

To be fair, when there's a child who's screaming during the sermon, it's hard to hear what the preacher is saying. When there's a child who scampers away from their parents during the choir's anthem, some of the harmonies might be a little off. When the child behind you is rustling papers or crinkly toys, you might not catch every word of the Eucharistic prayer.

That's all true. Those things might be distractions to one or more individuals in their worship. If that's true, then arguably I need to be distracted from worship, because it would seem my worship is more about me than it is about G-d. 

Plus, the approach to worship (that I need to get something out of worship or it's not worthwhile) carries with it the assumption that those who lead worship are the providers of a service, and those who are in the congregation are simply consumers.

The truth is, though, that when children are moving around and making some noise, I can both watch them and pay attention to the preaching.  I can hear the child behind me and hear the choir's anthem.  I can turn my head toward the child who's escaped from their family's pew while I continue to sing and pray.

Some congregations have the (explicit or implicit) expectation that when children are even the slightest bit "disruptive", the parents should remove them from the sanctuary.  Unfortunately, requiring parents to remove children from the sanctuary feels a lot like removing families from the community.  

When we invite (or ask, or require) parents to stifle their children, we communicate a belief that children's whole selves are not welcome in the Body of Christ. Of course we would never say this out loud. But if part of the nature of children is that they move around and make a little noise, to require them to be still and quiet is to say that the nature of children is not welcome in worship.

Obviously it's not appropriate for the sanctuary to resemble a day care center (where children are encouraged to move around as much as they want). At the same time, the sanctuary should not be as a library either.  The atmosphere should probably not be chaotic, and the atmosphere should probably not be overly restrained.  

We need to feel free to bring our whole selves into the worshiping community. 

We should echo the proclamation of Gospel with loud and bold Amens. We should sing with deep breath and full voices. We should eat heartily and drink deeply of the bread and cup when we come to the Eucharistic table. 

In our worship, we are called to embrace and embody and celebrate the fullness of life. Children should not be stifled – neither should adults, for that matter – for we are all the Body of Christ. When any one is missing (or kept away), the Body is lesser. 

And I think none of us (in the Church) want to lessen the Body of Christ.

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Fuller Center Bicycle Adventure

The weather this week has been … rather less perfect than we might have liked to have ridden through. I'm riding down the Natchez Trace Parkway with the Fuller Center Bicycle Adventure this week.

I rode on this same trip last year, and aside from one day of rain (which was almost pleasant to ride through, since it was relatively warm), we had beautiful weather. This year, however, only the first day was beautiful ... or even pleasant, really. We've been a little challenged since then by rain, cold, and cold rain.

But it's still been an amazing trip. The people who choose to embark on this kind of experience are, almost by definition, interesting people. And because the Fuller Center is such a phenomenal organization, the people are interesting and compassionate, willing to raise funds and give time and energy to helping other people.

From a purely personal perspective, though, the thing I've most enjoyed about this trip has been spending time with my family. Last year I rode this adventure with my dad, and it's really great to spend the week with him again this year. Plus, it's cool to see how much the other people on this trip enjoy my dad.

But more than that, this year my daughter came along on the adventure. We got to spend a lot of time this week riding bicycles together, which we both really enjoy. I got to ride with her on a day when she rode 100 kilometers, which was twice as long as her previous longest ride. I got to ride with her when we were sitting in a paceline going about 20 mph down the highway. It's fun to go fast.

In addition to the simple riding down the road on two wheels, it gave me joy to do a couple other things with my amazing daughter. She was interested in learning to shoot a basketball. So with our extra time one evening, we spent a while shooting hoops (which provoked a little nostalgia in some of the other riders as they remembered their dad teaching them to play basketball).

I also loved teaching her, on the day we helped repair someone's home, to use a handsaw and a hammer & chisel to cut and shape a board for the deck of the house.

But more than those things I've enjoyed being around Harper on this trip, because I get to see her as she is around other people (not just the way she is around her family). It's fun to watch her enjoy other people, and to watch other people really enjoy being around her. And I have to say, she's pretty great.

We may end up doing this ride together again next year … that'd be fun.

Rain, Rain, Rain

Day Two on the Natchez Trace Parkway with the Fuller Center for Housing Spring Bicycle Adventure today, and we encountered almost every single type of rain possible through the course of the day. 

Before we left one of the most mission-minded and hospitable congregations in the world, it just started to sprinkle a little bit.  Intermittent light showers gave way to stronger rain which soaked us from above as it fell, from in front as we rode, and from below as our tires kicked water up into our faces and skunk-striped our backs.

There were a few moments that it didn't actively rain on us, times when millions of tiny drops clouded our vision almost like fog, times when huge drops pelted our faces and shoulders ... and a couple of us even though there was a moment or two of hail.

The rain, and the somewhat-cold that came with it, didn't dampen our mood too much, but we were all relieved to get to the warmth of the Collinwood United Methodist Church.

We're having a fantastic adventure so far, and it's a tremendous joy for me to be with my dad and my daughter.  I think maybe I'll write more on the experience of being with family in the next couple of days.

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Lenten Midweek Reflection on Psalm 32

selfishness

greed

envy

deceit

cowardice

I am curved in on myself

and lack the concern for others I should have

I am selfish,

wanting for me before, and more than, for others

I am afraid

wishing that I can do enough to earn the favor of the divine

I know these things about me

(and I expect they're true of you ?)

I know these things about me

yet seem to not be able to move beyond

selfishness, greed, envy, deceit, cowardice …

are they

character flaws?

focus areas to improve on?

topics for self-improvement?

or plain old, regular and ordinary,

sin?

the latter, I expect ...

sin, to which

I am in bondage, and cannot free myself

Yet, happy are we

(not that we revel in sin)

happy are we

that our sin is put away

happy are we

that we have the opportunity to return to the Lord our God

happy are we

for God does not seek us out to condemn the world

but in order that the world will be saved

happy are they, we,

whose transgressions are forgiven

rejoice in the Lord

shout for joy

let our prayers of thanksgiving rise like incense

and may our prayers remind us, as well

that even when we are not happy, we are beloved by God.